Wednesday, December 23, 2009
John Lillpop's Slant on Santa Claus-Hey It's Christmas
Is Santa a Democrat or a Republican?
Satire By John W. Lillpop
While nearly everyone has weighed in with speculation as to the likely party affiliation of Jesus, not much has been written about Santa Clause.
Would the jolly old man be a Democrat or a Republican?
Consider Santa’s Democrat tendencies:
* Is a multilingual globalist
* Exploits children to enhance his public image and retain power
* Works just one night a year
* Hangs around with and employs fairies
* Illegally crosses U.S. borders every December 24th
Then, consider Santa’s Republican tendencies:
* Is a fat, old white guy who probably drinks too much and hates change
* Conspires with big business once a year to rip-off millions of average Americans
* Considers himself “compassionate” although he pays his elves far below minimum wage and no benefits
* Lives in a foreign land (North Pole) to avoid paying U.S. taxes
* Values the bottom line over the environment—think about all those reindeer droppings
Fact is, Santa seems split fairly evenly between Democrat and Republican. In that sense, the old boy reflects America almost perfectly!
John W. Lillpop
Satire By John W. Lillpop
While nearly everyone has weighed in with speculation as to the likely party affiliation of Jesus, not much has been written about Santa Clause.
Would the jolly old man be a Democrat or a Republican?
Consider Santa’s Democrat tendencies:
* Is a multilingual globalist
* Exploits children to enhance his public image and retain power
* Works just one night a year
* Hangs around with and employs fairies
* Illegally crosses U.S. borders every December 24th
Then, consider Santa’s Republican tendencies:
* Is a fat, old white guy who probably drinks too much and hates change
* Conspires with big business once a year to rip-off millions of average Americans
* Considers himself “compassionate” although he pays his elves far below minimum wage and no benefits
* Lives in a foreign land (North Pole) to avoid paying U.S. taxes
* Values the bottom line over the environment—think about all those reindeer droppings
Fact is, Santa seems split fairly evenly between Democrat and Republican. In that sense, the old boy reflects America almost perfectly!
John W. Lillpop
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An election for President and Commander in Chief of the Military must strive to be above reproach. Our public institutions must give the public confidence that a presidential candidate has complied with the election process that is prescribed by our Constitution and laws. It is only after a presidential candidate satisfies the rules of such a process that he/she can expect members of the public, regardless of their party affiliations, to give him/her the respect that the Office of President so much deserves.
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