Friday, May 22, 2015
As you know, my dear people, the last year for
me has been an annus
horribilus. The Royal House of Clinton has
been tormented by questions about our handling of finances and
subjected to tiresome questions about the tragic events in Benghazi–in
the furthest regions of our empire. And, sadly, also questions about
my Royal e-mails.
Nevertheless, I will not be daunted in my
desire and commitment to serve you the people. For the next seventeen
months I will be traveling among you as one of you, to listen to your
deepest longings and needs. I will be with you in your Wal-Mart and
beside you in your Burger Kings. I will drive with you down the busy
interstate highways of our land sharing your poverty and needs with
you.
How well I remember the days when the Duke of
Arkansas and I were impoverished. After we were expelled from our
Washington
Palace we hardly had two
mansions to rub together. We were so poor we had to remove thousands
of dollars of china, flatware, carpets and gifts from the
Washington
Palace just to
survive. Now, happily, benefactors from around our empire have given
just enough for us to scrape by.
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